Letting go: The price for moving forwards

Saying goodbye to old dreams and certainty

As the countdown clock ticks on my current 9-5 (and in parallel, my time left in Belgium), I’ve got some difficult decisions to take, things I need to let go of, and mindset shifts I need to make – if I want to change my life for the better.

Sometimes it feels like I’ll be giving up a lot, and I know that part of me will have a tough time saying goodbye to those aspects of my life.

Deep down I’m ready for a new lifestyle with different challenges. And some of the things I have now that I once dreamed of, no longer serve or excite me.

But that doesn’t make it any less bittersweet, closing the door on a long chapter of my life and “throwing away” things I once strived so hard to achieve.

Can you relate?

I bet you’ve been there too.

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Hi, I’m Holly - coach, mindfulness facilitator and author of Zestful Zen. I write about self-care, change, personal growth, mindfulness, and purpose. If you like life to be full of zest and energy, complemented by a zen, calm mind, Zestful Zen is the community for you! 💖✨

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My ‘let it go’ list

Financial security and steady pay cheques

This is the biggie for the sensible part of my brain. My late dad was an accountant and fear of debt is deeply ingrained in my psyche. But I also know there are no guarantees in life. Just because I’ve been with my employer for 15 years doesn’t mean there mightn’t be layoffs in the future.

I’m careful with money and I can be more frugal if I need to be. I’m ready to leap past my fears and take a chance on myself. I can hedge my bets with a portfolio career, and if I fail epically, I can always hit the job market.

Living and working abroad

If I’m being honest with myself, this is the one that really hits home in my heart, that has been holding me back. I’ve stayed with my employer for so long because it enabled an international career – with corporate support for all my moves around the world. It’s been an exciting life.

But I mustn’t forget that I found three overseas roles before I worked for them. Moving on doesn’t have to be the end of foreign adventures. Less simple, yes, but potentially more flexible – maybe I can be a digital nomad for a few months when the whim hits me or try out van life for a while.

Am I calling time on overseas adventures? Wei Rebo, Flores, Indonesia. Photo by author, Holly Bailie

Calling time on my younger self’s dreams

Inextricably tied in with the travel loss, I’ve been reluctant to face the reality that I’ve outgrown my earlier dreams. I’ve achieved what I set out to do, and I shouldn’t feel guilty about casting those goals aside. I’m not the same person now. I’ve grown.

I lived the life that 30-year-old me wanted, and it’s okay to seek something new. Yes, many people would be grateful for the life I have now, but it’s not greedy to want more or something different. My moving on will free up opportunities for others hungry to have the experiences I’m leaving behind.

Minor points

I’ll lose predictability in life, but that’s no biggie as I’m chafing at the boredom of my 9-5. I’ll miss my lovely colleagues, but that’s nothing new after decades of moving countries.

Okay, it’ll be a different story this time as I switch from office life to solopreneurship. But there are other ways of finding a community – co-working, Substack and I’ve joined the Female Entrepreneur Association. Friendly people like me find friends!

What’s on your let-it-go list?

My ticket to…?

I’ve always found that the only regrets I have in life are the things I didn’t do, the chances I didn’t take – never what I tried and failed at.

So I’d rather set off on this new adventure and have everything crash down around me, than find myself two years down the line wishing “if only I’d been brave enough to move on”.

It’s a leap of faith, but in return I’ll get:

Freedom, independence, autonomy

Yep, it’s financially risky, but I believe in myself, and I’ve proven over decades that I can deliver when the s**t hits the fan. I’ll only have myself to answer to and how freeing will that be?!

Fulfilment

The big motivator – my heart NEEDS more purpose. Making a difference brings me joy and makes my soul sing.

Chefchaouen, Morocco. Photo by author, Holly Bailie.

Challenge, excitement and adventure

I’m dying for a real challenge and moving from employment to solopreneurship will certainly give me that. I want the adrenaline rush and that churn in my tummy like a speeding rollercoaster ride.

I want to wake up excited each morning by the adventure ahead. Why keep waiting?

Balance

I know I’ll need to work my arse off to succeed. But I can also flex my business around my priorities – I can set my working hours, schedule in that Monday morning yoga class to start the week and seize on what inspires my creativity, without asking for permission.

And most importantly, I can align my business to my values – no more compromise or clashes with my conscience.

What could you gain from letting go of things that no longer serve you?

Questions for self-reflection or journalling ✍️

• What’s holding you back from moving forward?

• How have your dreams changed over time?

• What do you need to let go of?

• What risks are you prepared to take to get to where you want to be?

Now take action 🎯

• Decide what you’re going to do differently going forward.

• Commit to a measurable target or deadline.

• Identify any milestones towards your goal and what support you need.

• Share your plans with a friend (or the Zestful Zen community) for accountability.

• Take the first step!

• Celebrate your successes and lessons learned along the way.

We’ll be cheering you on as you seize your dreams! 🌟

Let’s share ✨

I’d love to hear your thoughts on letting go to move forward. Where do you see trade-offs in your life? What do you need to say goodbye to?

Let’s have a conversation in the comments or subscriber chat. Or feel free to drop me a DM. 💬

Have a sublime Saturday, friends! 🌞

Ways to connect with me 💬

DM me, jump in the subscriber chat, or connect via my website, LinkedIn or Instagram 😁

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