Going back to the drawing board
Rethinking how I show up in service and with soul
A belated happy Beltane (or May Day) to you all! How did you spend yours?
I started my Beltane morning by diving into the lovely ’s 5-day Joyful Growth to Bestseller Mini-Course. It seems fitting that it started on the Celtic change of season.
Unfortunately, the kick-off also coincided with one of my best friends visiting me to celebrate her 50th birthday. Cue four days of bubbles, Belgian beer, sightseeing, and conversations into the wee small hours.
200% restorative to take a few days off work, have fun with a beautiful soul and soak up the sun and fresh air. But definitely NOT conducive to making progress on the challenge!
So, this week I’ve been in catch-up mode: at my day job, my mindfulness teacher training, and in Joyful Growth.
Claire’s such a gentle and encouraging guide, and the community support is strong! Especially from the Sparkle crew.
But it’s also been an intense time. So much deep work: flashes of insight coupled with discomfort as I confronted things I hadn’t wanted to face, and asked myself, “where do I go from here?”
Hi, I’m Holly - certified coach, Breathworks mindfulness facilitator and writer of Zestful Zen. My mission is helping you to lead a more mindful, meaningful life, full of zest and energy, complemented by a calm, zen mind. Come on in and join our supportive community. 💖✨
Losing my perspective 🔍
I started my Substack as an experiment, a place to express myself, explore my creativity and connect with others.
As my writing confidence grew and I learned more about the platform, I began to think that maybe I could also generate some income - through my newsletter, affiliate links, and having a shop window for my coaching and mindfulness services.
Others have done this successfully, so why not me?
But I found myself torn by conflicting advice about when to switch on paid.
Some advocate straightaway, others suggest hitting a free subscriber threshold first (c.1000).
Then add in the paid offer options: pay-walling content, offering memberships, relying on a patron model…I was utterly confused on what choice to make.
But with my impending departure from Belgium fast approaching, a self-imposed deadline of quitting my 9-5 by the end of the year, and the inspiring success stories I heard from others ringing in my ears, I decided to turn on paid a few months ago.
Prematurely, it turns out.
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Wellbeing resources, personal growth tips & inspiration: subscribe to Zestful Zen.
Career and life coaching to overcome obstacles and achieve your personal goals.
Mindfulness courses: build mind-body connection, lower stress, be more present.
Crash and burn 🔥
I tried to follow the fabulous ’s advice on hyping myself, but something just didn’t sit right with me.
I did a half-arsed promotion to my subscriber list (one email coupon if I remember), buried upgrade links at the end of my posts and quietly added some paid content with barely any promotion.
There was no coherence to my offer and unsurprisingly, this attempt at going paid flopped. My heart just wasn’t in it.
Deep down, I knew that I didn’t have the capacity right now to create the bigger offer I really wanted to build and would be proud of.
Consequently, I felt deeply uncomfortable asking people to pay for something I didn’t value myself. But at the same time, I didn’t want to give up too quickly on trying to make a go of it.
Shining an uncomfortable light 🔦
I’m so glad now that I joined the Joyful Growth mini-course.
The outcome isn’t what I envisaged. I naively thought I’d absorb Claire’s wisdom, apply it straightaway and magically get my first paid subscribers.
While I’ve learned loads about working towards bestseller status, that’s not where I’ve landed for now.
Instead, I’ve had an even more valuable outcome: clarity.
I had some big lightbulb moments from the course.
1. Noticing really strong resistance to the idea of pay-walling my archive.
Claire highlighted how much value we hold in our archives, which could be monetised. She’s right.
But with a relatively tiny subscriber base, I’m not ready to lock up my posts and have even fewer eyes on them. I want to reach people and engage them through my writing.
2. Connection over content: community is what matters to me.
As we explored our paid offers, who we wanted to invite in, and so on, I finally understood why I was struggling with my paid offer.
With my limited capacity right now, I’d opted for a lower subscription price for monthly bonus content. But that isn’t what I want to offer. And it came right up against my resistance to “hiding” my stuff away.
What I really want is to build connection and community by creating a supportive space for sharing, having conversations, encouraging and inspiring each other.
Paid member content can add value and be part of this. But only once I have members! Locking things away with no one to engage on them isn’t working for me, and isn’t inviting people in.
3. Am I giving away too much stuff for free? Maybe.
Another of Claire’s wisdom nuggets is that people often give away so much content that subscribers think “why would I pay when I get all of this for free?”
Again, she’s right on the money with this one. But see 1 & 2 above – I’m not ready to lock things away without paid members inside to engage. A bit of a chicken and egg situation, I guess!
There’s also the issue of overwhelming readers. I’ve already reduced my posts from 3 per week to 2, but maybe it’s time to rethink my cadence again. I’ll ponder this.
Finding my joyful path again 🌟
So where do all these realisations leave me…?
1. Focusing on connection
Well, everything that Claire taught us about subscriber growth applies to free subscribers too. I can apply these lessons to growing my free community and building connections there.
I’ve noticed my follower count is growing much faster than my subscriber base. So, I probably need to invest more time in engaging on Notes.
And I’m feeling brave enough now to reach out to writers and creators I admire, to explore collaboration opportunities. Watch this space!
2. Slowing down the hurry
As Claire always says, “we have time”. I don’t have to rush.
Substack is a slow burn, so I’d panicked a little when working backwards from my solopreneur deadline, edging into a scarcity mindset. But I’m building up savings and Substack will only be one string in my bow.
I’d rather take the time to build a community I can hold space for, and a paid offer I can be proud of.
So for now, I’m switching off paid until I’m ready to put my all into launching.
I’ve got some ambitious ideas in mind for what my paid community could look like, but I’d also love to hear what you’d value.
If you can spare 2 minutes, it would be so helpful if you could please answer my survey!
Thank you lovely readers!
This is much longer than my usual posts, but I had lots to unpack from the Joyful Growth challenge. So thanks for taking the time if you’ve made it to the end!
And thanks to everyone who reads my posts, and all who engage. I know your time is precious and your support gives me the motivation to keep writing. 💖
Have a fabulous week!
Questions for self-reflection or journalling ✍️
What helps you to find clarity when your path forward isn’t clear?
Where is resistance showing up in your life?
If you could start over, what would you change?
What have you learned from going back to the drawing board?
Share your perspective ✨
I’d love to hear your reflections on going back to the drawing board. When have you rethought your plans? What motivates you to keep going when you’re starting again? Let’s have a conversation in the comments or subscriber chat. 💬
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Relate to so much of this. I value community so much too. Really excited to see what you're dreaming up.
Thanks so much for sharing Milena, and for the encouragement! I think maybe we all need to refresh things periodically or they get stale and we lose our motivation. Good luck with brainstorming, I’m sure you’ll find inspiration!